If you're tired of being strong

This is your Elphaba battlecry (and permission) to stop

Dear strong friend,

What if everything we've been taught about being strong has been missing something essential?

Something essential like the fact that for most of us, it isn’t sustainable…

Heck, strength is not something we even want to wear as a badge of honor, but we do anyway because we’re supposed to.

Right?

We're told that strength means pushing through no matter what.

Always showing up.

Never letting them see you sweat.

Being the one they can count on, no matter what.

Wearing the strong mask.

And so we maintain the facade. We make it look easy. We're everyone's rock, everyone's support, everyone's go-to person for...everything.

I’m gonna tell you something right now. I’m freaking tired of being strong.

I’m tired of holding it all together for everyone.

I’m tired of acting like life isn’t kicking my butt.

I’m tired of pretending that sometimes being a mom is the hardest thing I’ve ever chosen for myself.

“Just staying strong” is making me want to scream.

I’m wondering if you feel similar. If so, you’re in the right place, reading the right newsletter. Because I’ve started to see something different that I want to share with you now.

Real strength - the kind that actually lasts - seems to grow from a different soil. It doesn’t come from constant pushing, but through conscious permission.

And what’s the permission exactly?

The permission is to allow yourself to take the mask off. And in doing so, acknowledging that you’re not weak but that you are just deserving of rest.

The kind of strength that is easier to carry grows when we dare to:

• Rest between being strong

• Acknowledge our own needs

• Trust our body's wisdom

• Honor our natural rhythm

• Be vulnerable and open

• Let someone else hold space

This isn't about becoming less capable or letting people down. It's about creating the conditions where real resilience can grow. Where being strong includes being human. Where rest isn't the opposite of resilience - it's what makes resilience possible.

Think about how you support others. Would you ever expect them to be strong every moment? To never need rest? To always be everyone's rock?

Yet how often do we demand this of ourselves?

Hmmm.

Finding A New Way

Today, as I was leaving my mom’s house, I started to pick up all of my bags to take out to the car by myself (like I always do). My mom offered to help me and in return, the strong, hyperindenpendent woman inside of me responded, “I don’t need any help!”.

The crazy thing about that is that I did need help. But there I was again, with the strong face pushing through like I’ve been conditioned to do.

Being strong all of the time isn’t making me any stronger.

It’s making me tired. Irritable. Resentful.

I don’t want society’s version of strength. I want something realistic that I can actually keep up with.

So here’s what I'm learning about sustainable strength. It shows up as:

• Accepting that we don’t have to be strong all the time

• Permission to not have all the answers

• Space to feel what's real

• Surrender to your own humanity

• Emotional release

• Gentle returns to yourself

A Different Kind of Strong

This week, I invite you to explore what happens when you approach strength differently:

• What if you took off the mask?

• What if rest actually builds resilience?

• What if you could be both strong AND supported?

• What if you could be both strong AND surrendered?

• What if small moments of return matter more than constant pushing?

To my strong friends, it’s time to take off the mask, put your cape down and rest.

With you in practice,

Rashida

P.S. Remember, you don't have to earn your rest. Your strength includes knowing when to pause.